“Check please”

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I’ve been fighting the flu and had an episode of “nothing is working out”. I was talking to my daughter about things and I really felt like everything coming out of my mouth didn’t make sense. We were talking about the idea of recording things that we do for each other. I was starting to feel that it was a bad idea to record those good deeds. I believed somehow it would cause problems between each other and even those you didn’t help. Thankfully I woke up this morning and my headache was gone and I believe again it is important to never forget. Problems will definitely happen when one of you throws it in the others face. Everyone has experienced the feeling that you wished someone didn’t help you. You became so tired of hearing about it over and over again. Why would someone want to make the person feel bad that they just helped? I doubt they wanted to make you feel bad, more likely they didn’t feel appreciated. Fearful that it was a one way transaction. Would you ever tell someone?  “That waiter keeps asking me over and over again to pay the bill for my dinner.” We all understand that paying for a dinner you asked for and then ate makes complete sense. You can say the meal wasn’t tasty or that the bill is wrong but you understand that there should be payment. Now what would happen if you went there to eat week after week for years and the waiter didn’t get around to giving the bill? What if that waiter cared about you and saw you hungry? The total would obviously be growing. Should he just forget about all that he gave and pay for it himself? Shouldn’t you at some point realize that you forgot to pay and pull out the cash? I’ve heard many people in relationships defend the No Payment Policy as “They enjoy doing things for me”. Maybe they do enjoy seeing someone they care about happy but no one enjoys feeling taken advantage of, forgotten in their time of need, and not care about. Now I ask: Should the giver or the receiver record the good deed? I think it’s so important that both should remember. The receiver has a duty to show to the giver that they appreciate. The giver owes himself the respect to at some point realize they need to stop bringing food to that table. Raise your hand to the ones that care about you and say “Check please” and then pay up.

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